Every relationship is unique. Of course, there are certain scenarios for the development of relations and attitudes, which can pull certain interactions. But still, each of us walks his own way of building these relations. We all have deliciously good, so that I want to soar.
Or, on the contrary, the whole future is perceived negatively and seems to have all ended. We all sometimes want Council and other examples. And we all feel that in relationships we go through certain stages of development. What are they? How to learn useful experience from each of them in order to avoid mistakes and “do not bump”?
Like any process, relationships have their stages. Each of them takes time. Someone one stage can be delayed for a year, someone will slip him a month. Moreover, even the partners do not always pass all stages of development of relations together. Someone can get stuck in the first stage, when another already survived it all. Yeah, these relations questionable future. But to build a real strong relationship of trust is possible only after passing all the stages of their development.
That is to say, the zero stage . On it we are looking for reflect your feminine and masculine essence in members of the opposite sex. Our preference and desire for certain types is based on family experience. The role of both parents, for his feeling in the family, confidence in your place in the family and in the absence/presence of childhood injuries. Obsessive, endless search for a partner speaks about a certain immaturity of the individual.
Interestingly, at the stage of search marriages. But to achieve a real relationship this motivation is not enough. Also at this stage go back to those who survived the breakup of a relationship or a personal crisis.
2. It is ruled by chemistry
Famous stage in any relationship – love. The stage of recognition, the stage of famine. Very easy and pleasant stage of the relationship, and the same shallow. At this stage, the relationship starts nice and just as beautiful, quick and painless are over. The easiest time when partners see each other exclusively advantages and disadvantages. The soul is full of feeling, that’s it, now, so long awaited. And the body is in its turn filled with hormones that often affect his condition for the better – most of us love loses weight, acquires a healthy glow – the circulation of blood increases, there is a glint in his eyes. This stage cannot last more than 12 months – our body will allow prudent not to Deplete it any longer. At this stage it would be wise to refrain from sharing important decisions (marriage, birth of children), because the effect of this “drug” over and begin the next stage of relations.
Always after the satisfaction of hunger there comes the feeling of satiety. The same thing happens in relationships. No, feelings don’t just disappear, you are happy to communicate and look forward to meetings. But they should not have to occur every minute. Joint leisure is becoming less romantic, but it is not perceived as a problem. There is no need to spend all the time together, but the relationship becomes more harmonious and peaceful. Simultaneously, melts pink veil and partners begin to see not only the virtues but also the faults of the other.
4. Disagreement and rejection
In fact, this is the stage where many relations and over, returning both partners in the search stage. This is the crisis that occurs in any, without exception, pair. A turning point when it becomes impossible to hide the discontent and irritation. At this time, the habits that are touched by dull start to irritate. Dissatisfaction catapulting into contention and a series of recriminations – after all, your partner has also accumulated claims to your touching point. All of a sudden becomes not so perfect and rosy as before. Sometimes you think you fell into a trap from which there is no escape.
Most couples break down and give up at this stage. The most important thing here – calmly and critically to see the situation and accept the fact that this is normal. You do not need to reflect partner and take it out on the scandal in response to his accusations. Realize that this step is necessary for the normal development of further relations. Because only by accepting the partner with all his flaws and virtues, you will be able to move to a new stage. And if you try to change the person for your relationship is easy to tear, and you go back to the beginning. While there is no guarantee that, when in a new relationship up to this stage, you will not happen the same thing that is happening now. A vicious circle can last a lifetime, so at this stage we need to gain wisdom, patience and take a step forward. Yes, it’s a big job, but that’s what your partnership is born the real thing.
5. Patience and acceptance
The crisis is over, you did it and realized that it is possible to talk and negotiate. It turns out that any problem is not a collapse, and the way for joint development. All solved, your relationships become more Mature and deep. The stage of patience does not mean you have to remain silent, and then all by itself will resolve. At this stage comes the realization that the problems are not solely to blame others. Responsible for relationship are both partners. And it is not necessary so much to pay attention to the smallest details – there will be many, but essentially for your universe they do not mean anything.
The most important transformation that takes place with each partner at this stage – the awareness of the need to change yourself. This is the stage of the expected victory of reason and mutual respect.
There is already a lot you can learn. Each of you is an individual with different habits, concerns, thoughts and plans. And every one of you respects the space and the thoughts of each other. At the same time you acknowledge your debt to others, feel the need to care for and protect. Now you become close friends without losing the romantic parts. Growing trust in each other, so the relationship is easy. To pay attention to the little annoying things there is no desire. The scandals of the blue is baseless and stupid. Important common desire to develop and move towards your goals. Your family is the most important thing there is and now you’ll really understand.
7. True feeling
Perhaps already at the stage of recognition and chemical storms, you said the word “love”. But if we are talking about stages of development, that true love comes only now, after passing all the previous stages. This stage is the highest point of development of relations. Is the goal to be pursued. It is impossible to achieve true love without going through all the stages of its inception. It is important to understand that the problems, difficulties and frustrations are also the stages of development and play a no less important role than falling in love, idealization, and passion. Trials in a relationship you shouldn’t be afraid – because the reward comes true, absolute love.
To love you can go a lifetime. To learn to love through suffering and joy, UPS and downs, hardships and good fortune. And be sure to reach true love, growing up with your partner.